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| Alleluia™ The only salvation you'll ever need. Available at fine apothecaria everywhere. |
| Not intended to remedy ecumenical disputes, absolve trial by fire or rescue heretical souls. Use only as directed by licensed Inquisitor. Side effects may include unfounded accusation, involuntary admissions of guilt, repression of religious and political freedom, unrelenting screaming, hallucinatory dementia and permanent fatality. |