Coruscant Daily InterPlanet Grudday, Lurch 41, 28594 G27
EMPLOYMENT - Help Wanted Full and Part Time
 
Hyperdrive mechanic + co-pilot for Corellian light freighter; must not be clean shaven; lucrative tax free income and fringe benefits, thrilling adventures in exotic systems; must be willing to look the other way; ask surreptitiously for Solo at Mos Eisley drop field, pad ð ζ Þ Tatooine
Fireman, 3 yr accreditation at flamethrower, accelerants and document transport; extensive criminal background check & blood tests; informant bonuses; apply London Fire District 451
Certified crabclaw driver for respected corporation; two year hitch; suitable pay scale, lightmiles points + medical expenses;
Colonial Marines, Centauri Prime Central
Imperial Guard dispatcher, Echelon Alpha; previous training in all types of combat; utterly loyal, totally ruthless and dedicated to performance of mission; lifetime commitment; full disability coverage; Imperial Red Guard Barracks, Coruscant
Receiving clerk at LA Soylent plant, night shift only; good people skills and experience with ANATOS spreadsheet; must be tight lipped, trustworthy and pass security check; nonunion rates; 4297-6500-13 for interview
Droid body shop repairman - prior experience with metallic, phenolic, ceramic + nano-helix; pod piloting a plus; age unimportant Equal Enslavement Opportunity employer; inquire at Wattos SpaceSalvage Yard & TechEmporium, Mos Espa
Trained exorcism expert; undeterred by infernal manifestations; adept at deleviation & dispoltergeisting; low pay but heavenly fulfilling position; apply in person to Georgetown Wash DC Archdiocese for very private interview
Nonunion miners: magmic rylothium levraft ladlers, Mustafar Manufacturing; chemospheric tibanna gas meteorship scoopers, Bespin; apply Calrissian LTD; no health or death benefits
Dental technician for custom specialist practice; implantation, removal and denture fitting of lupine canines, dinosaur cuspids, shark incisors, snake fangs and piranha needles; superior scale wage, paid holiday and vacation, 401K, idyllic island setting; send resume to drmoreau@lostsouls.com
Archeology professor at Marshall College; beginner + advanced classes three days per week plus half day student conferences; tenure plus funding for objet d'art expeditions; dead languages erudition, witty irony, rugged good looks, weapons proficiency, inflexible opposition to all forms of oppression and aptitude for quick thinking in perilous situations necessary; hefty compensation for recovered artifacts; grave desecration not a problem
Zookeeper handler, reptilian experience prereq; desire to learn new techniques and willingness to get extremely dirty; complete health coverage + death benefits; security supervisor and main-frame programmer positions also avail; submit application and salary reqs to jurassic.islanublar/aol.com
Waste management tech; experience with Sanicrush XJ multiple unit apparatus; 22.5K Republic credits to start, Imperially mandated raise after 6 months; apply to Enlistment Officer, Death Star @ Alderaan Ring
Master cabinetmaker/upholsterer for long established funeral home; full time sunrise to sunset daily; 67K plus hefty medical insurance; no blood test or background check; apply in person at Verkalak Funeral Home, no phone calls
Snow removal: top notch bonded performance by Hoth's hottest fusion equipped company; any depth, any arctic wasteland, any day; no eves; taun taun and wampa
extermination extra
Jack Frost Inc 222/800
Sailing ship commander, Masters Certificate with low morals clause required; duties inc lying, theft, dueling, pillaging, jail breaks, binge drinking, wenching, naval combat; Caribbean tour with skeleton crew; benefits inc seat on union governing board + hair raising adventures; apply Black Pearl, Tortuga
Financial plotter planner for dubious interstellar investment firm; corpulence a given; devious market manipulation mandatory; consultant for very wealthy but clandestine clientele; enormous high yield dividends + profit sharing; apply in person at Zorbba Financial Group, Nal Hutta; no weapons
Wicked witch trainee; green skin, hook nose, pure evil required; insolubility, hatred for dogs and ability to control mechanical straw-stuffed beasts preferred; tutoring in herbal magic, spell casting, mystic divination + cyclonic teleportation; must pass Western Regional Level VI trial by fire; lifetime tenure; title to Ruby Slippers, Yorio Fortress and monkey army; apply to Personnel Dept, Oz Palace
Chef skilled at myriad alien cuisines; 38 hr dual swing shift; enthusiastic capacity to blend with diverse staff + clientele;
extra arms a plus; apply in person at Dexxter Jettster's, Coruscant Borough 26173-Lambda-4599
Theme park android repairman - hardware scavenger and diagnostician, MezTec models 1027 through 1034; knowledge of American western traditions circa 1880 helpful; hazard pay, saloon harlot benefits; Westworld, Iron Springs Utah

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