Spice Girls Announce Command Performance
ARRAKEEN Dune (AP) - Shabaz Scytale, business manager for the upcoming Spice Girls galactic tour, announced today that the Fremen pop group has agreed to stage a command performance for Emperor Paul Atreides and his young sister, Sainte Alia of the Knife. The concert will be held in the Royal Lesser Functionary Atrium of Muad'Dib's palace fortress. Tickets will not be made available to the general public since the Lesser Atrium only seats 183,000 and it is anticipated that all Fremen tribal elders, Fish Speaker commanders, CHOAM counselors, Spacing Guild Directors, Major and Minor House representatives and prelates from every religion and fringe cult will feel the necessity to attend.
While official confirmation from the Imperial Palace has not been made, it is rumored that Ste. Alia pestered her brother into requesting the performance as reward for her crucial role in the assassination of Baron Vladimir Harkonnen. The spectacle of the Spice Girls performing their big semuta hits Sandstorm Heart, Render Me and Devil Worm of Love in the presence of Emperor Muad'Dib left many pop culture critics totally speechless with apoplexy.