Lucasfilm To Open Star Wars Theme Park

SAN FRANCISCO Ca (AP) A new addition to George
Lucas's ever-expanding commercial empire was announced
yesterday. Lucasfilm Ltd. revealed plans to construct a
mammoth Star Wars theme park with luxury hotel, amusement
rides and a full scale, live action golf course. The park will be
much larger than any other amusement park, encompassing
several square miles. Numerous locations for the theme park
are being considered with a site near San Mateo, CA as the
leading candidate.
The Skywalker Hotel will offer suites based on a Tatooine
underground desert habitat, a Kashyyk tree house, a Naboo
royal palace, a Dagobah swamp cabana, a Coruscant highspire
penthouse and an Utapau cliffside dwelling. The hotel will also
feature several other amenities like the four-star Hutt Palace
restaurant specializing in exotic alien cuisine featured in the
films. The Ewok Cannibal Firepit Barbecue is intended for
children. The hotel will also have two adult bistros, D'an's
Cantina and the Deathstick Nightclub.
The amusement rides include the Millenium Falcon Lightspeed
Destroyer, the Rebel X-wing Roller Coaster, Speeder Bike
Pursuit, the Boonta Eve Podrace, the Coruscant SkyDrive, the
Grievous Deathwheel and the Mustafar Lavalanche. Many
games and shows will be provided for the entertainment of
children like Whack-a-Space-Slug, the Pfang & Talyn Petting
Zoo, Kashyyk Wroshr Tree Tower Swing, the Gungan Sea-
Quarium Swimming Pool with live gooberfish, Watto's Astro-
Jetsam Emporium and Betting Parlor and Max Rebo's All-Star
Alien Floorshow featuring lipsist Sy Snootles and dance artiste
More interactive activities like the Jawa Potshot Shoot Out,
Mos Eisley Backstabber Bazaar, Droideka Dreadnaughts, the
Death Star Obstacle Course and the Geonosis Coliseum
Execution Playground are intended for participation by the
entire family.
The golf course will contain holes derived from famous settings
in the films. The front nine will consist of the Tatooine Dune
Sea with live banthas and the infamous Sarlacc pit beast; a
Coruscant street warren with mercenary snipers; Dagobah
swamphole with quicksand traps; a Kamino arcology driving
range defended by Jango Fett; Jabba's dungeon with
Gamorran guards and Animatronic Rancor; a Tusken Raider
encampment with rampaging Anakin Skywalker; a Naboo
waterfall hazard ending with a Trade Federation droid
onslaught; the Coruscant power plant stalked by Darth Maul;
and the Asteroid Cavern with mynocks and giant tooth-
encrusted jaws.
The back nine will include the Endor Forest with meddling
Ewoks, rolling logs and a trio of AT-ST walkers; the Beggar's
Canyon labyrinth with rocket podracers; the Cloud City
carbonite freezer with a lightsaber wielding Darth Vader; Mos
Espa sandstorm hellhole with patrolling stormtroopers;
Geonosis droid factory with robotic machinery and hazardous
molten steel; Hoth glacial abyss with hungry wampa and AT-
AT walkers; Geonosis Execution Arena tee and battlefield
fairway; the Death Star spacedock featuring a claustrophobic
trashmasher tee, automated defensive lasers and awe inspiring
planetbuster; and the final hole will feature a full scale Mustafar
volcanic eruption with Emperor Palpatine wired for 10,000
volts of static electricity.
It is estimated that the park will employ 6,500 workers and
will cost in the range of 5.7 billion dollars. Construction is
slated to begin soon and the park is expected to open by
Memorial Day 2013. Its premiere will no doubt be attended by
numerous Star Wars celebrities and a kilometer-long army of
Star Wars fans. It is anticipated that the demand for entry into
the park will be so intense that reservations will be necessary.
The delay for tickets could be several years.
"Weesa hopin' to host a big big Jedi Masters Tournament,"
said Lucasfilm spokesthing Jar Jar Binks. "Da prize will be
lotsa Republic credits and weesa inbite all da goffers to come.
Meesa bettin on Ani Skywalker but wedder anyone surbibe,
meesa doan tink zo."